Tertia Riegler

Feminine Embodiment Coach

personal growth

THE SECRETS OF EMPOWERED HIGHLY SENSITIVE PEOPLE

by

Overview

Since learning a few years ago that I was a highly sensitive person, I have explored different things to help me navigate my sensitive nature. Highly sensitive people have a more sensitive nervous system, and they become easily overstimulated if this is not managed.

In this video, I share with you what I believe are the secrets of empowered highly sensitive people who thrive. So, if you are also someone who feels too much, I hope you find this helpful!

Prefer to read instead? Here is the transcript

In today’s video. I want to share with you some empowering tips for highly sensitive people. Now, these are the tips that I have come to rely on myself, as I’ve navigated my life and my journey as a highly sensitive person. If you’re new to my channel, my name is Tertia. I’m a coach. I work with mostly highly sensitive women and on this channel, I talk about things around self-worth and self-love and feminine energy. I talk about manifestation. There are some meditations on here. I do energy healing videos and I also talk about things around mindsets. If any of that sounds interesting to you, if you are looking for a place where you can find ways to learn about accessing your inner power, then join our community and subscribe, and also make sure that you hit the bell, this way you will get notified of my new videos. I haven’t made a video on high sensitivity for quite a while, and I really wanted to make this one for you because I think that the things that I want to share with you are really, really helpful if you are a highly sensitive person. My biggest challenge that I had when I first discovered I was highly sensitive, I found that in the beginning, at least, I used to filter my whole life and all of my experiences through this lens of being highly sensitive. Even though I believe that it’s very important to know yourself as a highly sensitive person, that’s not the only thing that defines you. This is something that I see time and again. When we are sensitive, we kind of interpret everything in our lives, through that filter. I think that that can be very limiting. I want to share with you my empowering tips on how you can step into your full power as a highly sensitive person. Now, the first tip is to understand your triggers. You’ll know by now, if you know that you’re a highly sensitive person. You’ll know by now that there are certain things that trigger you. There are certain things that seem to amplify your sensitivity. And so it’s very important for you to embark on a, call it a journey of self-awareness, where you get to know yourself, you get to understand what are the things that trigger you. Now, you can really look at the triggering aspects in two parts. We have internal things that trigger us and external things that trigger us. As sensitive people, we are more susceptible to things in our environment; to being hungry, to being cold, to being exposed to loud noises, to being exposed to bright lights. But not everyone has got the same level of resilience when it comes to this. Some people can handle a lot more than others and that’s why it’s important for you to kind of learn what are your triggers? How much of something can you stand before it begins to affect your nervous system? Because that’s really what high sensitivity is all about. We have a very sensitive nervous system. So if you can begin to understand what are those things in your environment, in your external environment, that causes your nervous system to become over-stimulated, you can begin to navigate that. You can begin to manage that better because it’s your responsibility at the end of the day. It’s your responsibility to take the best care of yourself that you can and knowing what your triggers are, and then accommodating for them in your life, as best as you can, is part of that responsibility. The second is to take care of your emotional and your mental health. This ties in again with being knowledgeable, or being aware of what our triggers are. All people, no matter if you are highly sensitive or not, we all have emotional and mental triggers but it seems that for sensitive people, the impact of these triggers are a lot more intense and we feel them a lot quicker than what non-sensitive people might do, for example. So it can happen that our resilience and our bounce-back time is a lot less than people who aren’t as sensitive, whose nervous systems aren’t as sensitive. That’s why I believe it is so, so, so important for us as sensitive people to do the inner healing work. I think that a big thing that can contribute to us struggling with our emotional and our mental health is resistance against accepting who we are. We don’t want to accept our sensitivity. We fight against it. We think that it’s a curse or that it is something that’s a bother in our lives, and we wish it wasn’t so. But the truth is your sensitivity is a beautiful gift when you begin to honor that, and when you begin to live your life, allowing for that to be the way that it is. Then the final tip that I have to share with you is to be discerning with the information that you take on. We live in a age where there is so much information available, on every topic under the sun. But not all of this information is necessarily the truth for you. So really be discerning with all of the information that you take on. Even the information that I share with you, the things that I tell you on my channel, don’t just take my word for it. Always listen with a critical ear and see, does this really apply in my life? And does this speak true to who am and to who I want to be? One of the things I specifically want to talk about are some of the Facebook groups that are out there. Now, there are many, many Facebook groups that are wonderful, wonderful communities for highly sensitive people, and they really provide support and that can really help you on your journey. But they are also those groups where the vibe is very much woe is me. In my mind, I’ve been in some of these groups and I’ve since left them. They create a separation between everyone else and highly sensitive people and there’s almost an expectation that everyone else should treat us in a different way because we are sensitive. They should accommodate our sensitivity in the way that they treat us. I don’t agree with that because I believe that it’s our responsibility to accommodate our sensitivity. It’s up to us to make sure that we live our lives and we make the choices in our lives that honor us. It’s no one else’s job to take care of our sensitivity. Now let me know in the comments, which of these tips resonated the most with you and perhaps, which is the one that you are going to start using first because there’s not been enough of that in your life up until now. The bottom line that I want to leave you with is as a highly sensitive person, your first priority is to take care of yourself. Don’t wait for other people to do that. Don’t wait for other people to change who they are to accommodate your needs. It’s your responsibility to make sure that you honor your sensitive nature, know what are those things that trigger you, take care of your emotional and your mental health. It really is in your power to live as your most empowered version. I really hope that you found this video helpful. If you did, please share your thoughts in the comments below. Also give it a like. It really helps to get my video shown to more people, if there’s interaction and comments on my video, so I’ll really appreciate you helping me out in this. Share this video with any one who you think might find it helpful. If you haven’t yet subscribed, then please join our community and subscribe.
As always, thank you so much for watching. I love you and I’ll see you in the next one. Bye.

THE POWER OF SHADOW WORK WITH THE DIVINE FEMININE (5 POWERFUL EXERCISES)

by

Overview

In this video, I share 5 powerful activities to get you started on doing shadow work with the Divine Feminine.

Shadow work heals us on a deep soul level and opens the space for us to fully love and accept all parts of ourselves. This is a powerful way to free up your life force energy, embody goddess energy and awaken the Divine Feminine.

TAPPING MEDITATION FOR SELF-LOVE & SELF-WORTH | ENERGY CLEARING SESSION

by

Overview

We carry within us the power to heal ourselves and heal our lives, and I love combining EFT tapping and energy work for this. This tapping meditation for self-love and self-worth will help you connect, and begin to heal so that you can love yourself and accept your worth.

YOU SHOULD GET DRESSED EVEN IF YOU JUST STAY HOME

by

Have you given into the temptation of staying in your sweat pants or PJ’s the whole day? Well in today’s episode I want to talk to you about the benefits of getting dressed and why we should do it even if we have nowhere to go.

The psychology behind getting dressed

What is the psychology behind getting dressed in the mornings? We’ll take a look at that now and then you want to make sure that you watch until the end, I’ve put together four looks to show you.  

A lot of times when we experience great upset or stress in our lives one of the first things to go is self-care, and it’s actually quite ironic to think that we neglect ourselves so easily when that is actually the most important thing that we need to do in times like these. I definitely think that getting dressed, maybe putting on some makeup and some jewelry is part of a good self-care routine and I know how easy it is to let that slip. When I was fresh out of school I spent a year overseas working as an au pair and in the first few weeks, I was so homesick that I neglected myself terribly.  My personal hygiene went out the window, I ended up wearing the uniform that they provided me with every single day even though I didn’t have to.

I couldn’t sleep well,  I didn’t eat well and I really went into a spiral of depression, I had to work hard to get myself out of there. 

I know firsthand how easy it is to just let ourselves go. 

This is where the things that we wear can play such a big role because the clothes that you wear can change the state that you’re in. 

Cognitive psychologists at Northwestern University did some research to try and understand how our clothes can affect our state.

They took two groups of people, they dressed the one group in white lab coats and the other group could wear their street clothes. Then they gave them a task where they had to look for inconsistencies. The people who wore the lab coats had at least fifty percent less errors than the people wearing the street clothes and this led them to come up with a term Enclothed Cognition. 

What they suggest is that the clothes that we wear have a symbolic meaning to us and clothes enhance our psychological state. 

Maybe you can even think of a time where the outfit that you wore at a specific event or instance influenced or affected the way that people interacted and related to you. 

How do your clothes affect you?

If we assume that it’s true that your clothes have a symbolic meaning to you and that it can affect your psychological state, the question then is: what do your clothes that you choose to wear every day do for you? 

When you wake up in the morning ask yourself how do I want to feel today more dynamic, in control, productive,  calm, more relaxed and once you start doing this now you become intentional in your life now you begin to create your day and you choose what it is that you’re going to put out into the world.  

I think there’s a lot of power in our intentional choices and in becoming self-aware enough to say that this is how I want to feel and this is what I’m going to do to support me to get there.

I know from firsthand experience how easy it is to feel lethargic and unmotivated and uninspired if you don’t get yourself dressed in real clothes. And once you’re stuck in that negative cycle it’s very difficult to get yourself out of it. 

I think we’ve got enough going on in the world, that we need to do whatever it is that we can to support our mood and our mental well-being and I can tell you now that getting dressed in real clothes will help you do that. 

If you’ve not yet done so please remember to subscribe like this video if you enjoyed it and share it with a friend. Thank you so much for watching and I’ll see you in the next one. 

Watch video here

PERSONAL VALUES: DISCOVER AND LIVE BY YOUR CORE VALUES

by

personal-values

Imagine that you are a navigator on the open sea.   You are quite skilled at using the stars as your guide.

You trust this huge expanse of light, which flickers and shows you where you are in relation to the world.  Without the stars, you will drift aimlessly. You will go where the tides take you and end up in a location that is not of your choosing.

You can enjoy the quiet water, the gentle waves and the water lapping on the sides of the boat, and every now and again you look up to make sure that you are still heading in the right direction.

When a storm sets you off course, you can tell which way to go when the skies clear.

Our personal values are the stars in our own lives.  It is an abstract concept of those things we value most in life. Aligning our actions with our personal values elevates us.

Read on to learn how to discover your personal values, and how that can help you in your life.

Improve your Decision Making

Let’s say that you get invited to a dinner with an important client.  The dinner falls on the same night that you have agreed to spend a family evening at home seeing that you have been traveling a lot lately.

What do you do?  Do you accept the dinner invite with the client?  Or do you decline and spend the evening with your family instead?

When you know what your personal values are, it will make your decision easier.  Even better, you have peace with what you have decided.

Living in alignment with your personal values has the benefit that you start trusting yourself more, you honor your own decisions, your self-respect grows and so does your self-esteem.

How to Discover Your Personal Values

I’ve compiled a list of the most common personal or core values to help you.

  • accomplishment
  • fidelity
  • orderliness
  • accuracy
  • focus
  • participation
  • achievement
  • free spirit
  • partnership
  • acknowledgment
  • freedom
  • peace
  • aesthetics
  • fun
  • performance
  • authenticity
  • gratitude
  • personal power
  • beauty
  • growth
  • productivity
  • collaboration
  • harmony
  • recognition
  • community
  • honesty
  • respect
  • comradeship
  • humility
  • risk-taking
  • connectedness
  • humor
  • romance
  • contribution
  • impact
  • self-expression
  • courage
  • independence
  • service
  • creativity
  • integrity
  • spirituality
  • directness
  • joy
  • success
  • elegance
  • kindness
  • tradition
  • empowerment
  • lack of pretense
  • trust
  • excellence
  • leadership
  • trustworthy
  • fame
  • lightness
  • vitality
  • family
  • nurturing
  • winning

While I have given you this list, it is important to note the following.  These are just words, and these words or concepts will have a different meaning for every person.

For this exercise to be truly powerful and effective, you need to be crystal clear on what each core value means to you.  I explain the process below.

Grab a pen and a piece of paper, and go somewhere where you won’t get disturbed. Take 20 minutes to write down all the things which are important to you.

Then, go through your list and ask yourself with each value you have written down: “What do I actually mean by this, and what do I get from it?”.

Going through the list like this will whittle it down to 5-7 core values.

Now rank these in terms of importance 1-7.

We have to make sure that we remember what our core values are. The easiest way to do this is to stick it up somewhere where you can see them and look at them every day.

When you keep your personal values at the forefront of your mind like this, it makes it easier to be intentional in your daily choices and rituals.

Benefits of Living in Alignment with your Personal Values

  • Focus on what is essential
  • Increase your self-trust
  • Don’t question your own decisions
  • Increased peace of mind
  • A more purposeful life
  • More contentment
  • Easier to achieve your goals

How to Use Your Personal Values to Guide You

The most obvious answer here is that if you know what your values are, it can help you with your decisions.  

The lifestyle you live, the food you eat and the friends you hang out with.  All of these choices are influenced by your personal values.

If you are unable to make a decision about something in your life, there might be a good chance that you are out of alignment with what truly matters to you.

This was very clear for me in my own life when I had the opportunity to travel somewhere specific a while back.  

I couldn’t decide whether I was going to do it, or not.  Annoyingly, I kept on changing my mind. Yes, I’ll go, the next minute, No, I’m actually not sure anymore.

I couldn’t figure out why it was so difficult for me to commit, I mean I thought I would really love to go!  Until I really took the time to see what was going on.

It would have meant that I went without the kids, and at that point in my life, it was out of alignment with my personal values.  

The moment that I realized my indecision was about the kids more than the travel, I was able to decide and have peace with my decision.

Core Values Are Not Permanent

Our personal values are pretty consistent throughout our lives, however, they are not set in stone forever-and-ever.

When we experience big changes in our lives such as the death of a loved one, illness, infidelity or divorce, it can change what we value most.

So, discovering your core values is not a once-off exercise that you do, and then forget about.  

I feel as if I say this in many of my posts, but the season of our life that we are in determines so many things!

I get sad when I see people who are stuck in a certain period of their lives.  Our automatic thinking patterns can limit us in ridiculously many ways if we let it.  

There is great freedom in starting to focus on what is essential, discarding that which takes up unnecessary space and filling our lives with more of what gives us a sense of purpose.

3 STEPS TO BREAK BAD HABITS (AND REPLACE THEM WITH GOOD ONES)

by

hot to break bad habits

If you have ever tried to break bad habits, you know what a challenge it can be.

It is so easy to get into a bad routine or start a bad habit. It happens without you even thinking about it. Then when you try to change it, it feels like an impossible task. And don’t even get me started on the effort you have to put in!

Is this the way you look at habits?

When you think about breaking bad habits and replacing them with good ones in this way, you are actually making it a lot more difficult for yourself than what it needs to be.

Common myths about breaking bad habits

1. You need willpower to break bad habits

You don’t need to have incredible amounts of willpower to break a bad habit. If you rely solely on willpower to change your behavior guess what will happen. Yep, the first time that you hit a snag, or your willpower weakens (for whatever reason) it is the end of your new habit.

2. It takes 21 days to form a new habit

It does not take 21 days to make or break a habit. It takes…as long as it takes. Some habits, like taking the stairs (at least once a day for starters), or having a glass of water with your meal, can be started and kept up quite easily, others take longer. It all depends on you, your circumstances and the habit.

3. There is a single magical strategy to break bad habits that work for everyone

We are all wired differently. We have different needs, opinions, abilities and levels of determination. What works for me won’t necessarily work for you. The danger in this myth is that you feel like a failure if you struggle to break bad habits, or create and keep good ones.

A strategy to break bad habits

There are many ways to skin a cat, and when it comes to habits, it is no different. We all learn and grow in different ways.

However, there are a few universal truths that apply to everyone when you want to break bad habits.

You need to be aware of and intentional about the habit you want to change. It will help if you eliminate as many triggers as you can, at least in the beginning.

When you link the new habit to another (good) habit, it can help you remember to do it. And when you do it enough times your new behavior WILL become a habit.

1. Identify the bad habit you want to break

Habits are automatic actions that start to happen once we do the same thing over and over and over.

Our actions become habits once our brain decides this activity is repeated so often it can go onto the automatic storage slot for often performed activities.

If it has ever happened to you that you can’t remember something (like whether you took your vitamins this morning, or the road you took back to your house from the office), this is the reason why.

You can’t remember because you do these things without THINKING about it.

So, if you want to break a habit you first need to bring the habit to your awareness and get intentional about it.

2. Get clear about what triggers the bad habit

Spend some time to see if you can figure out how and when this bad habit shows up.

Is it at a certain time of day: after breakfast, when you get home from work, at 2:30 in the afternoon.

Is it during a certain event: speaking to your boss, while you are watching tv, drinking coffee or getting ready for bed?

What do you get as a result of this habit: it soothes you, relaxes you, saves you time, saves you from explaining yourself, saves you from thinking about your life.

3. Find a replacement habit

Decide on what new habits you want to build instead.

You will have more success when you replace one habit with another rather than just stopping a habit. If you try to break a habit without replacing it, you leave a void which, believe you me, you WILL try to fill.

Make a decision to really give this new habit a fair chance. Now link this to the cue or trigger you identified in the previous step.

Think about what resources you need to help you build this new habit. How can you remind yourself do this new habit consistently?

And here is another tip, if you skip a day, it’s not the end of the world. You haven’t destroyed any chances you might have of improving your life. Just carry on where you left off.

Keep at it until it becomes second nature

Your brain AND body will start to enjoy the new rewards that you get as a result of your new habit.

Before you know it, it will be moved into that special automatic slot in your brain. And when that happens, you won’t have to think about it anymore, because your new behavior will have become a habit.