habits

MORNING HABITS TO NURTURE YOUR FEMININE ENERGY

November 16, 2021 by Tertia Riegler

Overview

In this video, take you through 3 morning routine habits that will nurture your feminine energy. Traditional morning routine methods are very goal and action-oriented, and that is not the way of the feminine at all!

The feminine energy morning routine will allow more flow and ease into your day. I used to think that a very productive morning routine was the only way to go, but I have since learned that we benefit much more when we work with both our masculine and feminine energies.

Prefer to read instead? Here is the transcript.

If you read any article or you watch any video on productivity/success, they will tell you that a morning habit, or having a good morning habit, or a certain morning habit, is absolutely the way to go. And the earlier you get up and the more you get done before your day actually starts, the better for you. And I used to prescribe to this rule as well, but in today’s video I’m striking that from the record, and I want to offer you an alternative. So, I want to offer you a way of starting your morning, stepping into your morning, in a way that is less stressful and less driving, and instead have something that’s a little bit more flowing, and creates a sense of spaciousness and ease. My name is Tertia, and on this channel I talk about all things feminine wisdom, self-love, self-growth, and I show you how to use your inner power and the laws of the universe to completely transform your life. If that speaks to your soul, then I invite you to subscribe and join our community, and also hit the bell so you can get notified of my new videos. So, even though my idea of what should be in the morning routine has changed, I still believe that a morning routine is so important. And that is because the way that we first start our day, is going to affect the way that our day unfolds. And when we can start our day with space, and we can create a sense of ease, a sense of possibility, then it’s going to pull out in our day, versus a day where you just tumble out of bed and you stress because you’re late, or you’ve hit the snooze button so many times, and you just grab a coffee and you run out the door. What has changed for me though is, I don’t believe anymore that we should do as much as we can in order to be successful in our morning. That’s a very masculine approach, where you have a whole list of things to do and you tick off, yes, I meditated. Yes, I read my book. Yes, I journaled. Yes, I did this, and yes, I did that, whatever your morning routine encompasses of. So, in the video today, I want to share with you three habits, which you can begin to incorporate into your morning that is going to make all the difference. That’s going to give you that space of flow and ease that I spoke of earlier. And if you’re excited to learn about them, then hit the like button and we’ll get straight into it. The first habit is to have both structure and flow, and I think this is what’s missing from many morning routines, that there’s a lot of structure. But when we have both structure and flow, it means that the structure sees that at a certain time of day, in the morning, I have my routine. And the flow is, I do what my body needs. Now, as women, we have a 28 day hormonal cycle, which is going to affect our energy levels. It’s going to affect our mood and our emotions, and you’re not always going to feel like doing the same thing. So, we have to accommodate for what our body needs. So, this habit of giving more flow is a habit of where you check in with yourself, and you ask your body, what do you need? What is going to support you most in this morning? Some mornings it might be a gentle yoga flow. Sometimes it might be a strenuous workout. Sometimes it might be just journaling. Sometimes it’s going to be an embodied movement practice. The key then, is to check in with, what do I need, what is going to support me most in my practice this morning? Habit number two, is to carve out quiet time. So, immediately, if you’re a highly sensitive person or an empath, you are going to need quiet time in order to function in the world. You need that quiet time. For our morning routines it’s also important that we create this quiet time, because this is really a time where you can engage with yourself. It’s a time where you tune in with your emotional needs. It’s a time for you to do reflection, and it’s a time for you to really get into contact with your inner wisdom. That’s what we want to do. That’s part of the reason why we want to have this morning routine before we engage with the outside world, so that we can tap into our inner wisdom to allow that to guide us, to guide our decisions and to guide our actions as we go on, and we engage with the world. So, this carving out quiet time, it’s going to look different for different people, and it all depends on your life season, and also your life circumstances. So, if you live with other people, it’s a good idea to carve out this quiet time before they engage with you. So, this might mean that you need to get up five or 10 or 15 minutes before everyone else in your household, just so that you can have this time to get grounded and to connect into your body. And this is the one thing that you can’t get away from, is that you might have to get up early. But think about it. You cannot create spaciousness within yourself, if you are surrounded by chaos. So, what can you do, starting right now, that’s going to allow you to create that spaciousness? Where can you fit that in, into your current life? That’s a reflection question that you can sit with for a little bit. And then, the third and final habit that I want to share with you in this video is the habit of using all of your senses. So, being in our feminine energy, connecting to our inner wisdom, which is inherently feminine, means that we have to be in the body. And the best, fastest, and easiest way to get into your body is to use your senses. We’ve got our five physical senses you can use, that’s going to take your attention from out there and it’s going to direct it inwards. And again, there are various ways in which you can engage your five senses. You might like to have a nice bath, or you might like to use some essential oils, or light some incense. Maybe go for a walk, have a nice cup of tea, different things that you can use to engage the senses. And here’s another question for you to reflect with, as you begin to design this morning ritual that’s going to allow you to have both structure and the flow, and that is what can I do starting right now, that’s going to engage my five senses, with the idea that it will bring me back into my body? And then, here is a bonus tip that I want to leave you with, and that is the power of reflection. So, as you begin to design this morning routine, it is crucial that you take time to reflect on what’s working and what is not working, so that you can continue to tweak and adjust this. And this is also going to teach you the skill of learning to tap into your own inner wisdom, to see what is working for me, what is supporting me most in this moment, what do I need to do more of, what do I need to do less of? What do I bring in that’s going to allow me to have a fuller experience of my life? What do I need to do that will allow me to improve my communication or have a better conversation with someone, a more courageous conversation? So, never forget or underestimate the power of reflection, which is really a yin practice, a feminine practice, is the ability to reflect upon where we are, and then using our masculine, change direction into the way that’s going to support us most. So, I really hope that you found some insights and some golden nuggets in these three morning routine habits using our feminine energy, that’s going to support you in your journey of self love, self growth and self acceptance. And I’d love to know from you in the comments below, which one of these habits resonated the most with you. So, please let me know in the comments. Also, let me know your thoughts about this video and any other topics that you would like me to cover in your journey of self love. Please let me know about those in the comments as well. Share this video with anyone who you think might find it helpful, give it a like, and also if you haven’t yet joined our community, then please join us, subscribe. We’d love to have you on board. As always, thank you very much for watching. I love you and I will see you in the next one. Bye.

5 POSITIVE HABITS EVERY HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP) NEEDS!

August 11, 2020 by Tertia Riegler

Developing positive habits as a highly sensitive person (HSP) will empower you and support you to fully access your abilities and strength as a highly sensitive person.

If you’re a highly sensitive person then you’ll know that you experience the world a lot differently than most people.

Highly sensitive people make up only about 20% of the population.

Because we are in the minority it’s so important for us to develop rituals and practices that can help us deal with the overstimulation and the overwhelm that we experience from interacting with the rest of the world.

I found out that I was a highly sensitive person about five years ago.

During this time I was feeling really overwhelmed with everything in my life and I started looking for answers.

I was a new mother, it felt as if there were just so many things affecting me, and I was tired all the time.

5 POSITIVE Habits Every Highly Sensitive Person HSP Needs!!! | Learn how I cope with being overly sensitive. These are 5 habits that are integral to my life as a highly sensitive person. Being highly sensitive doesn’t mean your life has to be a challenge and that you must learn how to stop being overly sensitive. HSP overthinking can be overwhelming and these tips for highly sensitive people can shift you into a more empowering space.

I felt overstimulated and it sometimes even felt like my skin was on fire because my nerve endings were running all the time!

When I found out about the research that was done by Dr. Elaine Aron on high sensitivity it was a huge light bulb moment for me.

On the one hand, I was like oh yes! I’m not the only one experiencing this and there is nothing wrong with me!

On the other hand I was disappointed. I thought, ok, so this is how my brain has been wired and I can’t change this.

However, I began to experiment with different practices and habits to really support me at this time.

These positive habits have since become integral to my life, and I think that any highly sensitive person will benefit from them.

HSPs Deeply Process Information

Highly sensitive people get overwhelmed and overstimulated because of the level at which we process information.

For example, if we go to a party, we don’t only take in all of the information, and sights and sounds, but when we leave, we sort of take the party with us.

We continue to engage in it energetically even though we aren’t at the party anymore…

Continue watching video

FINISH WHAT YOU START – HOW TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT

May 31, 2019 by Tertia Riegler

Are you someone who easily starts on a new project but you often find it difficult to finish what you start?

Most of us aren’t short on great ideas – going back to school, getting the basement redecorated, starting a business, getting fit.

But then life sort of happens and we leave unfinished projects in our wake, only to feel bad that we can never seem to reach some sort of an end.

It’s easy to feel demotivated when your mind is working against you, and that makes it even harder to finish what you start.

Especially when you then start comparing yourself to other people.

It happened to me this week. I’ve been diving into personal development blogs and looking at what the *big* guys are doing.

I started feeling insignificant. As if what I have to say doesn’t matter.

It looked so tempting to just give up.

But we can’t live like that.

Even when we feel as if we are insignificant, or we don’t have the right words, or we’ve never run a mile, or cooked a healthy meal before, we still owe it to ourselves to give it a shot.

And that got me thinking: I pretty much design my life every morning. We all do, whether it is a conscious act, or whether it is through our habitual thoughts and automatic patterns.

So then, how can we design our lives to stay motivated and finish what we start?

There is no short answer, but a good place to start is to know your personal values and live in alignment with them. That means to make sure that all your decisions honor your core values, and what is important to you.

Don’t expect something from yourself which is not authentic to who you are.

So, how do we finish what we start?

It’s fun to start new things.

But typically it follows a certain process.

You get all excited about your new project
There are lots of things to think about, research, buy, build or change and this keeps you in motion.
Then once the foundation is in place, the upkeep comes.

It’s heady to get caught up in the excitement of creating things.

You are enthusiastic about setting yourself up. You get carried away imagining how great it’s going to be.

But after a while, you lose momentum. Daily upkeep becomes boring and you start thinking of (totally-valid-in-your-mind-anyway) reasons why this wasn’t such a cool idea.

Maybe you lose faith in your own ability to succeed when the newness wears off, and reality sets in.

You lose sight of what it is that you are actually trying to do here.

And usually, that’s when you start comparing your results or efforts to that of others.

You start telling yourself that what you are doing doesn’t actually make a difference, or it is not really so good and therefore you are wasting your time.

So you shove it under the carpet and go after the next shiny object.

Imagine this. You want to run a marathon.

So reality hits and here comes the slog of having to run every day for 2 miles. Pretty soon you stop enjoying your cute pair of running shorts. Your running shoes don’t make you feel so fast anymore.

One day you find an excuse for why you don’t need to run today. Then, 2 days later, another excuse. And again and again. Until finally, you find your shoes 4 months later, shoved into the back of the closet with only a few sad cobwebs for company.

See the big problem here?

You become focused externally and you forget WHY you actually started in the first place.

If you understand why this happens to you (and that it most likely will), it makes it easier to take care of your behaviors and habits and change your outcomes.

Remind yourself what it is that you are trying to do here. That is why setting goals and looking at them again and again, is what will help you finish what you start.

Remember, the answer to sustained changed is to take continuous small actions.

That is why you need to set goals for yourself.

This way, you know what it is that you want (need) to do. Give yourself a deadline too. Without deadlines, we don’t have a sense of urgency to push us into action.

Warning: Instead of creating the biggest-damn-ass-goal that you can possibly think of and stopping there, rather create a smaller goal that will get you to your ultimate BIG GOAL.

Why?

So that you don’t freak yourself out by going after something which is completely outside of your domain of power of where you are *right now*.

This then is the process I suggest:

Set small goals
Commit to your new project and remind yourself what you are trying to achieve
Continuously review how you have done so far, and see where you can do better / save time / be more efficient

Little steps.

Let’s go back to the example of running.

Big Goal: Run a half marathon

Small goal: get cute running gear and commit to an initial running schedule.

Then, once the glamour of the new outfit and super fast shoes wears off, and you’ve been keeping up with you 2 days running a week, you move onto a new goal that you set within the overall goal.

Add 1 more day to your weekly running schedule.

Shave 30 seconds of your existing time.

Add another 2 miles to your distance.

You get the picture. Now you are starting to challenge yourself. This is what keeps you motivated and inspired.

A huge reason why we don’t finish what we start is because we go too big too soon.

When I started doing yoga 18 months ago, I didn’t decide I was going to do yoga every day for the rest of my life. Talk about overwhelming.

Instead, I decided to do yoga 2 days a week to start off with, and with only a few poses at that. I then gradually increased the number of poses in my workout, and the number of days.

After about 2 months I build up to a 20-minute sequence which I now do daily, without even thinking about whether I should. It has become a habit and part of my morning routine.

What if your goals change?

It happens that we start a project or follow a new interest, only to realize after a while that we really don’t want that.

Your personal values will determine whether you push through for the sake of finishing, or whether you stop and go into a new direction.

But a point to mention here is that we should never take our commitment to ourselves lightly.

Even if you do find that your priorities have changed, if you practice the habit to finish what you start, rather than abandoning projects willy-nilly it will help improve your life in incremental ways.

WHAT IS INTENTIONAL LIVING?

May 8, 2019 by Tertia Riegler

Do you ever find that you drive home, and when you get there, you can’t remember the road you drove?

Or you leave the house and lock the door without thinking about it, only to wonder after you have left, if you did lock up?

Many of our actions and behaviors are automated. This is the brain’s way of being more efficient and conserving energy.

But the downside of this is that we can become so automatic in our behavior that we just go through the motions without actually living.

The price we pay is that we waste our lives away. Conversely, intentional living makes every day count.

What is intentional living?

If you look at a definition of the meaning of intention you will see that it means:

“On purpose, with a plan, the determination to act in a certain way”

Just like minimalism, intentional living is not set in stone and it looks different for different people.

At the core of it, intentional living is about living purposefully and making sure that your values and your actions align so that you can live a satisfying life leading to your goals.

Understand your values

It follows that in order to be truly intentional, you will need to understand and honor your core values.

Your core values can be explained as the things which are most important to you.

They influence your decisions and play a role in how fulfilled you feel with your life. We feel disconnected and unhappy when our actions and the choices we make in our daily lives are not in alignment with our values.

When you know what your values are, it helps you to make better decisions and lead a happier life.

How to practice intentional living

Here are 3 ways in which you can be more intentional in your life and your choices.

1. Simplify your environment

We are distracted by clutter and interruptions, and even if it doesn’t bother you, it does affect your productivity and efficiency.

Research shows that people who are used to distractions and being interrupted may develop ways of working faster. However, it comes at the cost of having a higher workload and increased stress.

The clutter which causes disruption is not only physical clutter but also emotional and mental clutter. In addition, digital clutter, a new baby on the block, is a huge time thief.

We get lost in the data that is available online and we become overwhelmed by the choices presented to us.

When you are overwhelmed by choice, usually the response is to not choose at all.

This means that you are not intentional in your life but that someone else is actually deciding for you how you should lead your life.

2. Practice gratitude

When you have a mindset that is full of gratitude for everything and everyone that is in your life, you lift your vibrational frequency.

The reticular activating system (RAS) in our brain is responsible for deciding what is important and what should be filtered out.

Imagine if your brain couldn’t do that. We would go crazy with all of the information that we receive at any time. Also, how would we know what to focus on?

So your RAS helps you by making filters for the things that you focus on, to make sure that all the necessary information gets in. And it decides on what is necessary based on your thinking.

That’s why when you pay attention to something you start seeing it everywhere. You pay attention to a red car and then you start noticing that there are so many red cars on the road.

Or in a crowded room, you can shut out the conversations but you pick up when someone calls your name.

It works with gratitude too.

By practicing gratitude you become aware of even more things to be grateful for.

The more you have to be grateful for, the more grateful you become…you get the picture.

3. Develop healthy habits

Our habitual daily actions determine the outcome of our lives. These habitual actions become routines, and they form our days and shape our experiences.

Most habits are actions that start small, and are occasional.

When we continue to repeat them over a period of time, they become hardwired into our brains and create new neural pathways.

This is what I was talking about at the beginning of this post. Our brains create the neural pathways so that we can do things without the brain having to expend energy on thinking and deciding about it.

Intentional living goes hand in hand with being intentional in our actions. We can consciously create and build habits that support our goals, our happiness, and our overall wellbeing.

The way to start new habits is to attach them to existing habits.

Let’s say you want to start drinking a glass of lemon water every morning. Link this new habit to something you already do. So, go drink your glass of water as soon as you’ve been to the toilet.

As with most things, if you say “I will do it later”, chances are that you will forget.

The main thing to keep in mind when trying to break a bad habit is that nature does not like voids.

That is why we often fail when we try to “stop” doing something.

Stopping an action creates a void that needs to be filled. That makes the old habit sticky and difficult to break. Instead of stopping something, try starting something new instead.

Intentional living is not at the end of the road

You don’t arrive there suddenly one day, instead, it is the little actions you take every day that creates an intentional lifestyle.

The world and our lives are alive.

We are constantly growing, evolving and changing.

It is inevitable that change happens. What does not have to be inevitable, is that this change happens WITHOUT our participation.

To me, that is what intentional living is truly about.

To be in charge of my feelings, my choices and my thoughts so that I behave in a way that brings me closer to my purpose and the things which are important to me throughout my life.

What are the ways in which you are intentional in your life? Leave me a comment below, I’d love to read it!

SIMPLIFY YOUR DIGITAL LIFE: HABITS FOR DIGITAL MINIMALISM

April 18, 2019 by Tertia Riegler

Digital clutter is as distracting as physical clutter. Our computers and phones demand more of our attention than ever before. These habits will help you simplify your digital life and help you organize your digital information.

I’ve been working on a photo book project these past few weeks. It prompted me to finally take control and start to simplify my digital life.

So.many.photos.

They are in the cloud, on my smartphone, on my external hard drive, on my husband’s smartphone, and on our digital camera.

And so many of them are duplicates!

This frustration I’ve had with my photos is only the tip of the iceberg though.

I have a lot of digital stuff that I have been accumulating, and I’ve been shoving it all onto external hard drives to keep it *organized*.

Out of sight, out of mind right?

It’s like having that scary cupboard in the hallway.

The one where you shove everything in and you just pray you never need to open it because the avalanche of stuff might just crush you as it comes tumbling down.

It happens so quickly!

I’ve reached the point where I’m reviewing my digital habits and simplifying my digital life, as I’ve been doing in my physical and mental spaces.

Defining digital clutter

The main reason you’d want to declutter your digital life is so that you can get time back to spend on more important areas of your life.

Digital clutter complicates our lives, it slows us down (not in a good way) and it impacts our productivity. Similar to physical possessions, it’s anything which requires maintenance, distracts us and demands our attention all the time.

With the amount of information available online and the ease of sharing documents and files between computers, it is not surprising that our computers quickly become cluttered with all types of digital files.

We become slaves to the notifications and the pings which constantly clamor for our attention. We get sucked into social media. We struggle to go through an entire meal without looking at something on our phones.

We have become digital consumers who rather receive than take action.

And here’s the thing: Digital clutter becomes mental clutter.

Instead of making life better, technology can imprison you, unless you simplify your digital life.

Start to simplify your digital life

We all have different tolerance levels.

Our interpretation of what a minimalist lifestyle looks like is different for everyone. The same goes for our interpretation of digital minimalism.

I get stressed out when I have more than 20 unread emails in my inbox. They bother me until I take care of them. You might be able to handle more!

So start off by first spending some time reflecting on your digital habits.

Do you *organize* your digital life by moving stuff from one location to another?

Do you find you have to keep buying more storage, cloud space or external hard drives?

Do have an inbox full of newsletters or coupons or specials that you never read?

How much time do you spend on social media?

What digital stuff takes up mental space in your life?

If you have the goal of reducing digital clutter, you need to change your habits otherwise you will always have the same problem.

Understanding your current habits and behaviors makes it possible to choose different actions instead.

Habits to Simplify your Digital Life

Here are a few things that you can consider as you simplify your digital life

Check email at a set time each day when you have the motivation to take action and deal with it

Keep your desktop clean, if you do need files there, keep them in folders

Have fewer folders but make them bigger, and use the search facility to find your files

Remove Social Media apps from your smartphone (take it for a test-drive, you can always add them back again)

Delete bookmarks of sites you don’t regularly visit if you need to find something you can always google it!

Permanently delete files in your bin at the end of the week

Likewise, clear your downloads folder at the end of the week

Move the best photos you want to keep from your smartphone to the cloud or external drive once a month and delete them from your phone

Remove notifications, they only serve to distract you and feed on your fear of missing out

Leave your smartphone at the door with your keys when you get home

Disconnect for at least one day a week

Unsubscribe from marketing newsletters you don’t value every 6 months

Try for Inbox Zero if that interests you

Create a separate email account for “junk”, use this to sign up for marketing newsletters

There are better ways to relax

Many of us have the habit of relaxing with our phones after a long day. I used to “relax” like this a lot of the time.

But in reality, going down the internet rabbit hole only adds to our mental clutter.

It was painted so clearly for me when, on a recent holiday, I had no cellphone reception and I also had no access to the internet.

I left my phone in my bag for the 4 days we were there. What I found surprising was the sense of freedom I felt of not being constantly pulled by my phone.

I have been chasing that feeling again, but I have until now changed the habits that led me to feeling not-free.

So as I am developing new habits to simplify my digital life, I hope that this post inspires you to simplify yours too.

3 WAYS TO STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS

April 5, 2019 by Tertia Riegler

Have you ever wondered if it is possible to stop comparing yourself to others?

We start the comparison game at an early age and everyone does it. It is actually happening in my house right now thanks to our kids.

Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING is compared. They push their noses right up to their milk glasses to make sure that one does not get a drop more than the other.

They compare the speed at which they can brush their teeth. Get dressed. Race down the stairs.

After dinner, they compare the sizes of their stomach. He Whose Stomach Bulges the Most is King of the Castle.

It’s cute and sometimes exasperating to see how they measure themselves against each other. Their sense of identity seems tied up in who can lift their bed the highest.

Maybe your sense of identity is also tied up in how you compare to others. Let’s talk about how to stop comparing yourself to others.

The effect of comparing yourself to others

It is part of human nature to compare yourself to others. According to Social Comparison Theory, comparison to others is how we evaluate ourselves. We measure our own abilities against that of others to give us an idea of how we are doing.

It could be the incentive you need to bring about changes in your own life when you see someone else’s achievements. On the other hand, seeing how well you are doing in comparison, can give your self-esteem a little boost.

But if you find that often you feel bad, envious or discouraged, it is time to stop comparing yourself to others.

1. Live more intentionally

To live with intention simply means that you pay attention to your life and what you are doing.

Every day is a new opportunity to choose actions and make decisions to support you in being the person you want to be.

I’ve found that since living more intentionally, I don’t really care to compare myself to others so much.

It’s most likely because when you live intentionally, you are consciously living in alignment with your values and goals.

When you are being mindful, and you focus on living the present moment instead of the future or the past, you begin to feel happier.

2. Develop your sense of self

When we fall into the trap of always measuring ourselves against people around us, we end up feeling either inferior or superior to others.

Basically, this habit of comparing yourself to others is driven by an underlying sense of not being enough. We have a deep-seated belief that who we are is not enough. And we want to confirm if this is true or not by seeing how others are doing.

Your sense of self is the perception you have of yourself.

When you have a strong sense of self, you can get a more realistic evaluation of yourself. Your perception is not colored by insecurities, memories of past failures or wishful thinking.

Develop a stronger sense of self by learning to silence your inner critic. Start to believe in your own abilities. Set small goals for yourself that you can achieve and acknowledge your success when you achieve them.

3. Just stop comparing yourself to others

A guaranteed way to make you feel bad about yourself is to compare yourself to others.

Seeing someone else’s new job, lovely home, obedient children or big bank account and thinking that it is better than what we have, makes us unhappy. It causes us to have anxiety and stress and it drags us down into a spiral of negative thinking.

Our habitual way of thinking creates neural pathways in our brain, which is the brain’s way of saving effort and being more efficient. Even if you have hardwired this behavior, it is possible to break the habit of comparing yourself to others.

Each time you catch yourself that you compare yourself to others, change what you are thinking. For example, instead of thinking “So-and-so is better off than me” remind yourself that you don’t really know what is going on in their lives.

When you see someone else perform a task or achieve a goal that leaves you feeling inferior, look for something in your own life to be grateful for or proud of.

Live a self-directed life

Make the decision today to stop comparing yourself to others and to start living mindfully and with intention.

It’s funny to watch little kids compare themselves to see who is the best. But when we are adulting, it becomes tragic when we allow our sense of self-worth to be dictated by how we measure ourselves against others.