Perfectionism lives in your mind and it causes you to set the bar very high for yourself. Perfectionism can also stop you from going after your goals because you worry too much about what others think of you.
I don’t know how perfectionism shows up for you, but in my life, perfectionism combined with the fear of what others will think of me, causes me to become very concerned about the actions, and the comments and the things that people do, thinking that it’s a reflection on my ability or my skills.
The problem is when you do that, you overcomplicate every little interaction and that holds you back.
What you will do is resist changing, resist trying to do something new. Resist going for that job interview or resist starting up your own business. You will resist asking that person on a date because you are afraid of what others will think.
I talk about self-awareness a lot because you are unable to change anything in your life unless you have awareness of it.
So, start noticing when you hold yourself back, or change your opinion, or resist doing something out of fear of what others might think.
When you notice that, you can start changing your behavior.
2. People don’t really care about what you do
People all have their own lives and their own issues to deal with. They don’t really care what you do with your life unless it has a direct impact on them.
We think that our lives are in the spotlight, but they’re not. Everyone has their own challenges!
3. People don’t like it when we change
Often the reaction that we get from the people in our life when we change something, can be negative.
When this happens we end up not changing at all. But think of it as a dance. If I suddenly change my steps, you won’t know what happens next. So I need to give you time to catch up to me!
I’m sure you know this quote by Wayne D Dyer: What other people think of me is none of my business.
That’s a good point to start from to understand that the fear we have about what other people think of us is really a mindset.
It is a self-created construct and because it lives in your mind, it’s also possible to change that.
Do you worry about what others think of you?