Learn about embodied self-love and how you can go from mind-based living to whole being living. As someone who is walking this path myself, I discovered how my self-love and self-worth has been activated through deepening into my feminine energy which helps me uphold my boundaries and overcome self-doubt.
In this video, you’ll learn about 3 practices to embody self-love to create real and sustainable self-worth on a deep level.
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Prefer reading? Here is the transcript
In this video, I’m going to share with you three real ways in which you can embody self-love. Now often when we hear about self-love and how you can love yourself more, what comes to mind are practices like doing something nice for yourself, or using positive affirmations and self-talk to boost your self-esteem. We think about things like going for a facial or buying yourself something nice. Now these things are all supportive of helping us to deepen into self-love, but they are not really sustainable. And in this video, then I want to look at some other ways that we can create sustainable change when it comes to self-love, our self-worth and truly showing up as our most authentic selves. My name is Tertia, and on this channel, I talk about all things self-worth and self-love, feminine energy, and femininity, magnetism, pleasure, and all the ways in which you can stand sovereign in your power. So if that speaks to your soul, then I invite you to join our community and subscribe and make sure you hit the bell to get all the notifications of my new videos.
So I’m going to get straight into it. And the three ways that we can really begin to embody self-love has to do with our inner critic, with boundaries and with our feminine energy. So let’s get into it. So the first point that I want to speak about, and by the way, these aren’t like sequential steps. So there isn’t really a step one and a step two and a step three of how you can love yourself, but I’ve just put them in this order. So the first one that I want to talk to is to disarm the inner critic. Now the inner critic really has the purpose of keeping us safe. So it’s going to always uphold the comfort zone that we find ourselves in. And as soon as you move beyond that comfort zone, the inner critic is going to set off alarms because there’s a potential that you are putting yourself at risk.
Some of us, however, have a very, very overeager, overzealous and just downright mean in a critic and that’s really what I want to talk to in this video when I speak about disarming this mean inner critic. So this inner critic can have the voice of a parent, it is made up of different belief systems that we’ve accumulated through our lives. And it also is made up through our conditioning, through what we find from our culture and our society. Now, I want to just explore three ways in which this very strong and mean inner critic most probably may show up for you.
Now, the first one is the voice of self-doubt. And this is that little voice that says, no matter what I do, I’m not going to cut it. I’m not good enough. I’m not ready yet to go there or to do that. I first need to have many other things in place and up level my skills before I can dare to follow my dreams.
Another way that our inner critic can show up is as the good girl. I always put others needs ahead of myself, unable to say no, thinking that other people know better than me. So the good girl doesn’t really trust herself to be an authority in our own life. She doesn’t trust herself to say no. The good girl shows up when we don’t dare to disappoint anyone else. So we are really living according to these standards that have been put in place by our family systems and by our culture and by society.
And then the third way in which this inner critic can show up is in the way of being a perfectionist. And speaking as a recovering perfectionist, the perfectionist wants everything be just right. So the perfectionist says, I have to get it right. If it’s not perfect, if it’s not 100% a certain way just like that, then it’s not going to be good enough.
Now, the most powerful tool that you are going to have in dealing and disarming this very mean inner critic is you have to start with awareness. So awareness of this voice, what this voice is saying and how that then shows up in your life, how you feel and respond and act as a result of what this voice is telling you. That’s really going to be your entry into disarming the inner critic. And then in my experience, the foundational thing that will really support you to love yourself deeply and not be influenced by this mean self-criticism and even self-hatred that the inner critic can create in yourself, is to create a sense of safety. So for me, that foundation of safety is key into really then being able to truly love yourself in a sustainable and a real way.
So the second practice or way that you can then begin to embody self-love is through exploring and working and upholding your boundaries. So our boundaries really inform every single decision in our lives. And some of these things that I spoke to in the inner critic, especially around the good girl or the perfectionist is going to affect the way that you uphold your boundaries. And you might find that when you are tired or when you want to avoid conflict, or when you don’t want to get into trouble, then you just don’t have any boundaries in place. And then as soon as you get angry or you’ve had enough, and this is now, this is where you draw the line, then your boundaries become very rigid.
So here’s the thing. You get to decide what your boundaries are and you get to decide what they should look like. You get to decide what you are available for. So if you want to play around with boundaries a little bit, then you can try this out, and think of a situation where you don’t have a boundary in place or where you are not able to really uphold your boundary. And then imagine what boundary it is that you would like to have instead of what it is that you’re having now. And then you can play around a little bit and imagine, so if I’m upholding this boundary, who would I be in upholding this boundary? How would I hold my body? How would I sound? How would I speak? What words would I use? What would my energy be like? And this is really another way of becoming intimate with the language of your body and becoming intimate with a way in which you can best express yourself.
And then this brings us now to the third real way in which you can truly embody self-love, and that is to reclaim your feminine energy. So this is a journey that I am on. It’s a journey of mine that is still busy unfolding. And one of the things that I have found great value in, in this aspect of reclaiming my feminine energy is to work with archetypes. And I want to speak specifically to the wild woman archetype in this video. I’ve created a video a while ago, which I will link for you in the description below on my self-love journey and connecting with my inner wild woman. And I’ve also more recently made a video on archetypes and I’ll link both of those for you in the description below. So our wild woman is our untamed truth. Our wild woman is that essential, wild, authentic, and raw aspect of ourselves, where we are unflinchingly honest, where we have the courage to face our darkness, where we have the courage to embrace and play with our likeness.
And when we really align ourselves and uphold the energy of this wild woman archetype, what that means is that we truly become the authority in our own lives. We become leaders where we don’t rely on other people’s opinions and the way that other people do things and expectations rather of what others have of us. So we don’t align our lives to that, but we align our lives to what our own inner truth is. And the key question that you will ask yourself is, how can I live as my most true and authentic self today, or right now?
Now, practically, when we begin to embrace and embody the energy of the wild woman, what it looks like is it looks like starting to live more in sync with your own natural rhythm. So really following the direction and the impulses from your body, it also means that we slow down. And in the slowing down, you are then able to connect within, you are able to connect to the truth of the boundaries that you want to uphold, you are able to connect to that authentic voice that is not the perfectionist, that is not the good girl, that is not that voice of self-doubt. When we really and truly want to embody self-love, it asks of us to go and investigate and inspect and unravel all of the conditions and the beliefs and the limitations that are alive inside of us.
Self-love asks of us to be courageous and to believe in ourselves. And somehow this can be such a scary thought, the idea that I can believe in myself 100%. But these practices and these ways will get you so much closer to really showing up and standing in your sovereign power, fully embodying self-love. So I’d love to know how this resonated with you, and please share your thoughts, ideas, and impressions with me in the comments below. I also want to ask you to please share this video with anyone who you think might find it helpful and give it a thumbs up if you enjoyed it so that I know to create more of these. Thank you very much for watching. I appreciate you, I love you, and I will see you in the next one. Bye.