Tertia Riegler

Feminine Embodiment Coach

HSPs and Empaths

THE SECRETS OF EMPOWERED HIGHLY SENSITIVE PEOPLE

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Overview

Since learning a few years ago that I was a highly sensitive person, I have explored different things to help me navigate my sensitive nature. Highly sensitive people have a more sensitive nervous system, and they become easily overstimulated if this is not managed.

In this video, I share with you what I believe are the secrets of empowered highly sensitive people who thrive. So, if you are also someone who feels too much, I hope you find this helpful!

Prefer to read instead? Here is the transcript

In today’s video. I want to share with you some empowering tips for highly sensitive people. Now, these are the tips that I have come to rely on myself, as I’ve navigated my life and my journey as a highly sensitive person. If you’re new to my channel, my name is Tertia. I’m a coach. I work with mostly highly sensitive women and on this channel, I talk about things around self-worth and self-love and feminine energy. I talk about manifestation. There are some meditations on here. I do energy healing videos and I also talk about things around mindsets. If any of that sounds interesting to you, if you are looking for a place where you can find ways to learn about accessing your inner power, then join our community and subscribe, and also make sure that you hit the bell, this way you will get notified of my new videos. I haven’t made a video on high sensitivity for quite a while, and I really wanted to make this one for you because I think that the things that I want to share with you are really, really helpful if you are a highly sensitive person. My biggest challenge that I had when I first discovered I was highly sensitive, I found that in the beginning, at least, I used to filter my whole life and all of my experiences through this lens of being highly sensitive. Even though I believe that it’s very important to know yourself as a highly sensitive person, that’s not the only thing that defines you. This is something that I see time and again. When we are sensitive, we kind of interpret everything in our lives, through that filter. I think that that can be very limiting. I want to share with you my empowering tips on how you can step into your full power as a highly sensitive person. Now, the first tip is to understand your triggers. You’ll know by now, if you know that you’re a highly sensitive person. You’ll know by now that there are certain things that trigger you. There are certain things that seem to amplify your sensitivity. And so it’s very important for you to embark on a, call it a journey of self-awareness, where you get to know yourself, you get to understand what are the things that trigger you. Now, you can really look at the triggering aspects in two parts. We have internal things that trigger us and external things that trigger us. As sensitive people, we are more susceptible to things in our environment; to being hungry, to being cold, to being exposed to loud noises, to being exposed to bright lights. But not everyone has got the same level of resilience when it comes to this. Some people can handle a lot more than others and that’s why it’s important for you to kind of learn what are your triggers? How much of something can you stand before it begins to affect your nervous system? Because that’s really what high sensitivity is all about. We have a very sensitive nervous system. So if you can begin to understand what are those things in your environment, in your external environment, that causes your nervous system to become over-stimulated, you can begin to navigate that. You can begin to manage that better because it’s your responsibility at the end of the day. It’s your responsibility to take the best care of yourself that you can and knowing what your triggers are, and then accommodating for them in your life, as best as you can, is part of that responsibility. The second is to take care of your emotional and your mental health. This ties in again with being knowledgeable, or being aware of what our triggers are. All people, no matter if you are highly sensitive or not, we all have emotional and mental triggers but it seems that for sensitive people, the impact of these triggers are a lot more intense and we feel them a lot quicker than what non-sensitive people might do, for example. So it can happen that our resilience and our bounce-back time is a lot less than people who aren’t as sensitive, whose nervous systems aren’t as sensitive. That’s why I believe it is so, so, so important for us as sensitive people to do the inner healing work. I think that a big thing that can contribute to us struggling with our emotional and our mental health is resistance against accepting who we are. We don’t want to accept our sensitivity. We fight against it. We think that it’s a curse or that it is something that’s a bother in our lives, and we wish it wasn’t so. But the truth is your sensitivity is a beautiful gift when you begin to honor that, and when you begin to live your life, allowing for that to be the way that it is. Then the final tip that I have to share with you is to be discerning with the information that you take on. We live in a age where there is so much information available, on every topic under the sun. But not all of this information is necessarily the truth for you. So really be discerning with all of the information that you take on. Even the information that I share with you, the things that I tell you on my channel, don’t just take my word for it. Always listen with a critical ear and see, does this really apply in my life? And does this speak true to who am and to who I want to be? One of the things I specifically want to talk about are some of the Facebook groups that are out there. Now, there are many, many Facebook groups that are wonderful, wonderful communities for highly sensitive people, and they really provide support and that can really help you on your journey. But they are also those groups where the vibe is very much woe is me. In my mind, I’ve been in some of these groups and I’ve since left them. They create a separation between everyone else and highly sensitive people and there’s almost an expectation that everyone else should treat us in a different way because we are sensitive. They should accommodate our sensitivity in the way that they treat us. I don’t agree with that because I believe that it’s our responsibility to accommodate our sensitivity. It’s up to us to make sure that we live our lives and we make the choices in our lives that honor us. It’s no one else’s job to take care of our sensitivity. Now let me know in the comments, which of these tips resonated the most with you and perhaps, which is the one that you are going to start using first because there’s not been enough of that in your life up until now. The bottom line that I want to leave you with is as a highly sensitive person, your first priority is to take care of yourself. Don’t wait for other people to do that. Don’t wait for other people to change who they are to accommodate your needs. It’s your responsibility to make sure that you honor your sensitive nature, know what are those things that trigger you, take care of your emotional and your mental health. It really is in your power to live as your most empowered version. I really hope that you found this video helpful. If you did, please share your thoughts in the comments below. Also give it a like. It really helps to get my video shown to more people, if there’s interaction and comments on my video, so I’ll really appreciate you helping me out in this. Share this video with any one who you think might find it helpful. If you haven’t yet subscribed, then please join our community and subscribe.
As always, thank you so much for watching. I love you and I’ll see you in the next one. Bye.

MY TOP 5 TIPS TO RESET YOUR MINDSET & RAISE POSITIVE VIBRATION

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Overview

In this video, you will discover my top 5 tips to reset your mindset and raise your positive vibration. Highly sensitive people and empaths especially are often challenged by some of the experiences that cross their paths, because their experiences can be very intense.

You will learn how to, following the Law of Attraction, reset your mindset so that you can raise your positive vibration and attract better experiences into your life, how to clear your energy and stand in your power as far as narcissists are concerned.

Transcript

Your mindset determines the outcome of so many different things in your life. You actually create your experiences every day by the types of thoughts that you have. So, in today’s video I want to talk with you about how you can reset your mindset to raise your vibration so that you can start attracting the things in your life that you really want. So, we’re going to be looking at a couple of things. I’m first going to talk about what is mindset? Then I want to look a little bit into thoughts and frequencies and how they are linked? Thoughts and energy frequencies and then finally I’m going to share with you my top five  tips that’s going to help you reset your mindset. If you are new to my channel, my name is Tertia. I’m an EFT practitioner and a coach and I help highly sensitive people get unstuck break through the blocks that hold them back. So, that they can live better and feel better. Please say hello to us in the comments, subscribe. I’d love to have you as part of our community and remember to click the bell so that you can get notified of my weekly videos.  So, let’s kick off talking about what is mindset and the best and easiest way to think about your mindset is to think of a filter that filters how you see things. It filters how you experience conversations that you have with other people, interactions that you have with other people. It filters or colors in how you observe people doing something, your interpretation of what you see happening around you. So, your mindset is type of a mental attitude. It’s, type of a mental outlook and it really is made up of a whole lot of different things. So, it’s made up of some of the belief systems that you develop as you grow up and as you experience things. Some of the things might be what were transferred to you from your parents, from your society, the culture that you grew up in. So, we’ve got some beliefs about how we think, how we think things should be and how things should work and how people should be? Our mindset also has a lot of unwritten rules, right. So, we tend to create rules about how people should behave and how people should respond to us and how people should do things and how the world should work? So, we have these unwritten rules and that also forms part of our mindset. Let’s talk a little bit about how our thoughts actually then affect the way that we experience our life? Now if you’re a law of attraction student, you’ll know that our thoughts and our feelings have energy and energy has a vibrational frequency. The universe is also made up of energy and this energy also has a vibrational frequency, right.  Now, if you think of your thoughts and your feelings like a radio transmitter and you think of the universe, the energy in the universe as a receiver, then what will happen? Is the universe is always going to try and match the frequency that it receives from the thoughts and the feelings you pull the people and the experiences into your life. Who are on level with? Who you are being and if you don’t like what you are attracting into your life, if you aren’t happy with the things that show up for you. You can’t try to change those things out there. You have to start with changing who you are being and you do that by becoming aware of your thoughts and feelings. You do that by grounding yourself, you do that by clearing residual energy. Something that I see, shows up often when we talk about the law of attraction and changing your thinking, is there seems to be quite a big drive towards positive thinking? Think only positive things because if you think negative things, you’re going to attract negative things into your life and that’s not completely true in terms of how it works because our thoughts and our feelings have messages for us. And if you are going to simply try and paste positive thinking onto these thoughts and feelings, what you are doing is you are suppressing what is actually going on there but it’s still going to come out through your subconscious mind, right. And that’s a mistake that many of us make when we start to use the law of attraction in our life.  When we start working with energy and we start working with the universal vibration, is we become afraid of our own thoughts and our own negative thoughts because we think that it’s going to bring negativity in our life. But this is actually an opportunity for you to start clearing those lower vibrational frequencies that you have start clearing the residual energy and start working with the core wounds that are giving you emotions that aren’t of such a high vibration. Now, I want to share with you my five tips on how you can actually then begin to reset your mindset to raise your vibration to attract these positive things into your life. We can’t just live with our brains. We have to live with our minds, our brains and our entire energy body because we are both spiritual and physical beings. So, we need to bring both of those elements in. When we start on this journey of creating a life that we really want in a way that we really wanted, all right. So, let me get on to the tips then. So, the first tip for resetting your mindset, to raise your vibration is to practice compassionate self-responsibility. Now I’ve made a video about that before which I will link up here and it will also be in the description below. You can go, look at this video or go watch this video rather and in here I talk about how important it is that we start taking responsibility for our own feelings, our own emotions and our own triggers now. One of the big things when it comes to compassionate self-responsibility or practicing self-responsibility is understanding that we cannot wait for other people to change. Often we might walk around with this expectation to say that you know who how I am? That’s the right way. This is now the unwritten rules that we have on our subconscious mind. The way that I think and perceive and experience the world is the right way and the way that someone else does things is the wrong way. So, in order for things to become better or things to change that person or those people should do start doing things differently. I’m not going to change who I am, instead they have to do the work, they have to you, know take the first step they have to change. One of the things that I’ve noticed which is, which aligns with this type of thinking is the prevalence of information. That’s available out there especially in the highly sensitive and empath community about energy vampires and narcissists. It seems that every second person is either a narcissist or an energy vampire out to get us and I think what happens is we tend to put so much power perceived power onto these narcissists and energy vampires that we forget that we have got sovereignty. We determine how we experience things through our thoughts and our feelings and people only have the power over us that we give to them.   So, instead of thinking that a narcissist should change or an energy vampire who should stop sucking my energy, what will happen if we start focusing our attention on ourselves, if we start taking responsibility for our own triggers, if we start taking responsibility for creating stronger boundaries so that we don’t fall victim and I don’t even want to use the word but for lack of another word that we don’t fall victim to people who might not have our best interests at heart. So, in instead of hoping that they will change their ways and that they will stop doing, what they are doing rather focus the attention on the self. See, who I can change in my being so that I can show strong, show up stronger and more powerful in a different way into the world. The second tip is to stop making your happiness dependent on external conditions and this is something that we all have done. At some point or another, where we again walk around with this belief or this idea that once we have achieved a certain goal that we’ve set up for ourselves either in our personal relationships or at work or a financial goal. We think that once we’ve attained that goal, we’ll be happy. We’ll feel that we’ve arrived and then we will start feeling more confident about ourselves and we’ll start feeling more valuable as people and we’ll feel happier about who we are and our own achievements.  Now, the problem with that is those goal posts keep on moving and whenever something then in the outside world shows up that is not in alignment with our goals that affects our sense of self that affects our sense of happiness. A far better way to be is to stop making your happiness dependent on what happens out there but focus your happiness meter on who you are as a person regardless of your circumstances, regardless of the things that happen in your life and regardless of the things that you have or that you don’t have. When we start making our happiness dependent on the things that are out there, either the things that happen or other people’s moods then what we start to do is we create a scarcity mindset within ourselves. So, you have a mindset of lack an idea of who I am being and what I have at this present moment in time is not enough and when you have the scarcity mindset, you can think for yourself. What are the types of thoughts and feelings that you generate every day? What are the types of things that you think about? So, what are you vibrating, what signal are you sending out into the universe? And remember the universe matches the, the, information that it receives from you, the transmission that it gets. It’s going to continue to try and match that because that’s how it works, right. And if you have the scarcity mindset, then you are going to continue to see more scarcity. Show up in your life. You’re never going to find that relationship that you’re longing for. You’re never going to feel fulfilled in your career or in your personal life. Now, point three is to change your inner talk. That is the third mindset tip that I have for you is change your inner talk. Our subconscious mind listens all the time and the way that you speak to yourself and the type of words that you use and you know the chatter that you have inside your own mind. Your subconscious mind is receptive. It listens all the time and if you have a particular way of thinking, if there’s like a pattern in your self-talk those create new neural pathways. So, you are programming your mind to continue to think in a certain way, to continue to have a certain unwritten rule. So, become aware of what type of inner talk you have and if you see then that it is not supportive for you to create the kind of life that you want and to have the kind of experiences that you want and to attract the kind of people that you want into your life, then begin to change that inner talk, begin to change that self-talk. Now, some of the more typical inner talk patterns that can be preventing you from actually raising your vibration is if you are someone who tends to judge others a lot. If you find fault with the way that other people are being and the things that other people do if you have a lot of criticism towards other people and towards the way that they live their lives especially if it’s not aligned with the way that you live your life, then that again creates another level of scarcity. It creates a separation which lowers your vibrational frequency. I want to talk about energy vampires and narcissists again. If we tend to think that we are surrounded by energy vampires, by narcissists and that we are living in an insensitive world that is not geared for sensitive people and nobody understands us because 80 percent of the world are different to, you know us. Small 20 percent of people who have a different way of thinking and experiencing things potentially, you could be creating this unwritten rule that you are living in an unsafe universe, you are living in an unsupportive universe and now think about this. If you think that the world is an unfriendly place, at what level are you vibrating? What is your frequency? When these are the subconscious thoughts that you have because you might not necessarily think that out loud but you programming your subconscious mind that the world is an unfriendly place, that the world is an unsafe place. So, you can think what are the experiences and the people that you will attract into your life. That’s going to vibrate at that same frequency. Now, the fourth tip that I have for you is to meditate and there’s a reason why I talk about meditation so much. First of all, as sensitive people, our brains need quiet time to process and to reflect. So, meditation is the perfect thing to do, to allow our brains to do this because you are then in a quiet place. You are not thinking so much about the world out there and the things that are going on in your life. You’re focusing on your breathing and you are really trying to quieten down and allow yourself to go into a relaxed space. So, this helps the brain of the highly sensitive person because our brains tend to over process and if you don’t know about how the highly sensitive brain works. I’m also going to put a link for you in the description below so that you can go and take a look at that video that I’ve created. Okay! So, getting back then to meditation, the second reason why meditation works is because meditation is a very effective way for you to work with. Your own energy, remember I said earlier that we are not only physical beings, we’re also spiritual beings. We are energetic beings and we need to work with our own energy. We need to learn how to work with our energy and in my mind energy work is as important as taking you know a daily bath or a shower. Now, one of the other things that meditation is also going to be helpful with is for you to start thinking or creating different mind movies for yourself. So, mind movies, mind movies are those stories that you play out in your mind. When you think about something that might happen or you think about something that has happened. So, if you are in the habit of playing out the worst case scenario and the worst thing that will happen or you are in the habit of replaying all of the bad things and annoying things and angry making things and irritating things and unfair things that people over the years have said or done or you know told you. You’re again reprogramming your mind. You’re reprogramming in a certain set of thoughts and emotions. Thoughts and feelings which is going to affect your vibrational frequency, so meditation is going to help you to begin, to make different mind movies for yourself and you can use creative visualization or a guided meditation to do this and the process is you decide on what it is that you want to create in your life? It can be you want to improve a relationship that you have with someone. You want to have a conversation with a person and you want this conversation to go in a certain way or you want you have a certain goal that you, that you are working towards and what you will then do is to create a movie where you play out the different things that will happen to lead you towards the outcome that you want and remember to, you know amplify the volume. Turn up the volume and you know make the light brighter and the colors brighter so that you can really get the biochemical juices in your body flowing and in your brain flowing at the same time.  So, that’s how you can use meditation and then the final tip that I have for you is to become intentional in your living and this is probably, this should probably have been at number one because this to me is the key of living your life in such a way that you begin to attract the things that you want and desire and that is become intentional, become conscious of who you are being? It is very easy for us to flip into autopilot mode. That’s how our brains have been designed. Become conscious of how you are thinking? How you are responding to people? Become aware. If you notice one of these automatic programs are busy running, become aware of how you think about things and again meditation and contemplation is going to help you do this because now, you are quiet enough to actually think about how you are thinking, right. And then once you see how you are thinking about things and you feel into how you, you, think about things and the world and people and experiences, then you can choose how to respond? You can choose to respond with forgiveness or compassion or love or understanding or any of these higher emotions, higher vibrational emotions which is going to allow you then to lift your own vibrational frequency. Pay attention to your thoughts and your feelings. Don’t get sucked into the story of them and don’t get lost in them but develop that muscle of being able to lean into the thought or the feeling to lean into the emotion and discover what the message is for you so that you can then clear it. We really have so much power in our own hands and I say this in so many of my videos because it’s true. We can give our power away and think that other people hold power over us and things hold power over us but they don’t. We have sovereignty in our own lives and we can choose every day. How we can show up? How we can experience things and how we can weather the storms because life is still going to happen. Things are always going to happen to us, right. But, it’s how we, how we get through that. That is going to determine our experience of it. So, I hope that these have been helpful for you and I would also like to know if you have any other mindset reset tips that you can share with us. If you do, please leave them for us in the comments below. If you have enjoyed this video, then please give it a thumbs up and also share it with your friends. I would really be grateful if we can get this message of powerful intentional living and healing out to as many people as possible. Subscribe if you haven’t yet done. So, thank you very much for watching and I will see you in the next video.

ARE YOU A HIGH SENSATION SEEKING, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSS HSP)?

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Overview

In this video, you will learn more about what it means to be a highly sensitive person who is also a high sensation seeker. You could say that these traits have pretty opposite characteristics, so it makes sense that it can be challenging to be HSS HSP, especially if you are unaware of it.

If you can relate to many of the traits of a highly sensitive person, but you find yourself craving new experiences and you get bored with routine, you could be a high sensation seeker too.

You will learn about the 4 characteristics of high sensation seeking, how that translates for highly sensitive people and then I also share 3 helpful tips that can help you as a high sensation seeker, highly sensitive person.

Transcript

(Tertia) 00:00 Hey everyone! In today’s video, I’m going to be talking about the high sensation seeking, highly sensitive person or HSS, HSP for short. High sensitivity and high sensation seeking sounds like two completely opposite traits and actually it is. That’s why if you are a high sensation seeker and a highly sensitive person, it can be very confusing. So, that’s why I want to make this video to help you understand a little bit more about these two conflicting aspects that you have so that you can know yourself better and therefore create your life better. If you are new to my channel, hi!  My name is Tertia. I am an EFT practitioner and a coach and I help highly sensitive people get unstuck and break through the things that hold them back so that they can live better and feel better. Say hi to us in the comments, introduce yourself and please subscribe to my channel to get updated on my new weekly videos. So, high sensation seeking is something that is present across all boards and all people. So, it is not specific to a certain group of people but when it comes to high sensation seeking and highly sensitive people, there’s not a lot of information out there and the most definitive work is by Dr. Tracy Cooper. So, most of what I’m going to be talking about comes from the information that he has shared with us. So, let’s quickly look at what is high sensation seeking. What does that mean? I’m going to then share with you how it shows up for us as highly sensitive people and then most importantly, I’m going to tell you what you can do to incorporate and balance these two sides of yourself. So, let’s start then with what is high sensation seeking and really this can be categorized by four specific items. The first thing is that high sensation seekers are always looking for new experiences. So, that means they enjoy going to new places, different places, different restaurants trying out different kinds of food. They’re not really so fond of routine. The second thing that is particular to high sensation seekers is that they are thrill seekers. It means that they are at the extreme adventure junkies. They’re looking for things that can give them adrenaline rushes and they are also bored easily. So, they need to be stimulated. They get under stimulated quite easily and then the fourth specific to high sensation seekers is a sense of disinhibition.  So, that means a disregard sometimes for societal norms, societal rules and really going a little bit wild and taking things to the extreme. So, that is what high sensation seeking is putting that onto highly sensitive people. All of these specifics are present for highly sensitive people where the difference is that our risk taking is not so intense. So, we will participate in things that has a very low risk factor. So, we don’t really risk ourselves but we want that adrenaline stimulation or that, that adrenaline rush. We want stimulation. We do disregard societal norms as long as it is going to be safe and then finally we enjoy experiencing new things. Now, I have five signs that I want to tell you about. Obviously, there are many more. These are the top five that I want to share with you of how you can tell that you are an HSP HSS. The first is that you will rather be active than lying on the couch. You might feel the need to just vegetate on the couch or just vegetate because you are feeling exhausted but you can only do this for a little while and then you have this yearning and this need to be active and to do something and to, to, go out or to create and just to move. So, that can be one of the first signs. The second sign is that you value freedom above everything else. Freedom is a core value for you. You don’t like being told what to do. You don’t like being told how to think. And you like to make your own rules and again this is where some of that disinhibition comes in. The third sign is that you enjoy experiencing new things. So, while on a lot of the HSP blogs, they’ll talk about have this set routine. Make sure that you always know what is going to come next. If you are a high sensation seeker, the idea of always knowing what is coming next is terribly boring. You want to experience different things. You want to try out new things and you actually feel kind of depressed and sluggish if you have the same repeating routine every day but having said that, it is important for our brains not to get over stimulated by not having too many different new experiences all the time. So, again we need to find that balance. Now, the third or the fourth sign rather of what it is like to be a high sensation seeker and a highly sensitive person is that your moods can be quite extreme. There’s no middle ground. So, you can be very euphoric and then you could be very down. Down in the dumps and very low and there’s no golden middle ground. It’s either way up there or way down here and that can also be confusing because when you don’t know about yourself that this is possibly because you’re a high sensation seeker and a highly sensitive person. You could think that there’s really something wrong with you because you don’t have a measured emotional response. You get excitable very quickly and then you can also feel sad and affected by the world around you very quickly and that is actually then the fifth sign is that you get excitable very quickly and you are very keen to start things. You don’t need to wait too long to decide and to make a decision sometimes or most of the times. It’s very easy for you to first take action and then you might break and reflect whereas typically for highly sensitive people, a lot of times it’s explained that they are very, we are very deliberate and yes we can be very, very, deliberate but when you have that high sensation seeking part to you as well, then you will find that you might be quite impulsive at the same time to go and experience those new things. So, the biggest challenge of course is that we need to find a way to balance these two extreme sides. The most important thing is to accept both parts of yourself. When you accept that you have these two parts to you and that they both need to be honored, then you can start making choices. That’s going to support that if you don’t know that you have both this yearning to take time to process information and to be alone and at the same time you have this yearning for stimulation and adventure and new experiences. When you don’t know this about yourself, it is very confusing to try and deal with all of the emotions and the discomfort that come up as a result of you, not honoring your true nature because you’re trying to be something that you are.  So, I’m hoping that by the information that I’m sharing with you in this video, it’s going to help you get a new insight into yourself and a new insight in how you can as I said earlier marry these two parts of yourself saying no to yourself and having boundaries is the second tip that I want to share with you. There’s a lot of talk about saying no to people in your life and having boundaries out there but I think as highly sensitive people with high sensation seeking the high sensation seeking trait, it’s important that we learn how to say no to ourselves. You need to learn how to say no, so that you can balance your two extremes. You need to learn how to say no for yourself so that you don’t go for the rush. If it is time for you to take a step back and just recharge a lot of times when we are and this is especially when we extrovert it because you can be a high sensation seeker and introverted. So, it doesn’t mean that you must be extroverted. If you are a highly sensitive person and a high sensation seeker, it’s both introverts and extroverts. But as an extrovert, you run the risk of never stopping, never slowing down always surrounding yourself with people and action and activity and you need that time to process. You need that downtime otherwise you’re going to crash and burn. So, learn how to say no for yourself and you can only do that when you know what your triggers are and then the last tip that I can give to you is to stop hiding your sensitive nature and again this is something that I think comes easier for extroverted HSPs.  It’s very easy for us to divert or to revert rather to our extroverted nature, it’s very easy to put our extroverted side forward and present that to the world but whenever you are suppressing a part of who you are, that takes a lot of energy and that takes a lot of effort and often we feel exhausted and we feel drained and we feel like we cannot function properly in the world because we are suppressing so much of our true nature because we are hiding and denying so much of who we really are. And once we begin to discover who we are, once we begin to discover what makes us tick and what our triggers are and how we can, can, show up in the world. We begin to release that energy so that we can start using it for creating instead of suppressing. If you enjoyed this video, then please give it a thumbs up and subscribe if you haven’t yet done so, I’d love to have you as part of our community. Thanks very much for being here and I’ll see you in the next one, bye!

3 TIPS TO MANAGE STRESS AND ANXIETY AS A HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP)

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Overview

In this video, I share with you three tips to manage stress and anxiety, specifically if you are an HSP (highly sensitive person). Now, it is important to state this these tips are not about suffering from generalised anxiety disorder, as it is more focused on the normal everyday stresses that people may experience.

Often, we associate being highly sensitive as being naturally anxious. And while there is not direct connection between anxiety and sensitivity, there is a good reason why sensitive people tend to feel more anxious than others. It all has to do with the brain.

By the end of this video, you will know how to use brain training for anxiety, the importance of acknowledging your feelings, and how to work with your triggers.

Transcript

(Tertia) 00:00 Hey everyone! In today’s video, I’m going to share with you three tips on dealing with anxiety and this is a follow-on of my video that I made a couple of weeks ago about how do we deal with emotional triggers as highly sensitive people? So, I’ll link that video for you in the description below and go and watch that video first if you haven’t seen it yet before you come back to this one. Now, before we get started, I want to quickly talk about something else as I’m recording this video. I’m a couple of subscribers away from a thousand and we are growing, our community is growing and I just want to say thank you to each and every one of you who subscribed. Those of you that watch my videos and that you know regularly comment as I’m learning and finding my way in terms of what information you find helpful and the things that I can share with you, the things that you benefit from. I really appreciate all of the interaction and the comments and thank you for allowing me this space and for journeying with me. And I hope really that the videos that I’m going to continue to put out will have a big and great impact in your life. That’s the only thing that I can, that I can hope for and that’s why I’m doing this work if you are brand new to my channel, my name is Tertia. I am an EFT practitioner and a coach and I help highly sensitive people get unstuck and break through the blocks that hold them back. So, that they can live better and feel better.  Now, I want to talk about some things that we can do as HSPs when we struggle with anxiety. Before I start, let me just say that two things. Number one, I’m not talking about a generalized anxiety disorder. So, that is a completely different kettle of fish. What I’m talking about here is the normal anxiety that we feel every day as a result of the stresses in our lives, thinking about a looming project or thinking about a conversation that we need to have with someone or wondering about something that’s happening at the office or maybe happening at the home. So, it’s just about those normal kinds of anxieties that show up for us. That’s the first thing that I want to say and the second thing is that there’s no direct link between being a highly sensitive person and struggling with anxiety. But, if we don’t pay attention to becoming overstimulated, that can lead us to feeling anxious. So, there is the link between anxiety and being highly sensitive. It’s because our brain becomes overstimulated. So, it follows that if you know what your triggers are and you are able to better manage your triggers and take responsibility for your own well-being, then you can begin to manage any excessive anxiety symptoms and anxiety experiences that you have. Unresolved emotions can also cause you to feel anxious and we all have unresolved emotions because we all have a past. We all have experienced things that were done to us, we all have done things to other people and when these emotions are not resolved, then they can also show up in as triggers in our experiences today. The problem with anxiety is that it puts you into autopilot mode. So, when you are operating in an energy of anxiety, you start making decisions based on fear instead of decisions made on trust. You’re in autopilot mode. Your brain is in survival mode. So, the amygdala in your brain is triggered. Your system goes into fight or flight and this is a normal reaction. We, we have to be able to go into fight or flight because that’s how we survive. But, if that is a constant state of being, if you are finding yourself to be constantly triggered and constantly feeling anxious that can lead to all kinds of other problems and the things that I share with you in this video, the tips that I have for you is then to deal with this excessive level of anxiety that you’re always feeling. So, that you can begin to calm that down and begin to calm down the nervous system so that you can start making decisions from trust instead of being driven by fear which is what underlies the anxiety. So, what we want to do is we want to retrain our brain. When you retrain your brain in terms of how it responds to the different triggers, that’s also going to have the result that you are less triggered. You are less overstimulated because you’re accommodating for your triggers and your anxiety levels are going to come down. You’re not going to feel so anxious, so often. And one of the first things that you can do to retrain your brain is to stop talking about your anxiety as if it is a precious possession and what I mean by this is I’ve heard so often from my clients, some of the Facebook groups that I belong to even myself, we say my anxiety was triggered. I’m feeling so anxious again when I hear the, the cars you know the traffic outside it just makes me so anxious. Those things that you tell me, it just makes me feel anxious. So, we are labeling our feelings of discomfort and we putting that into anxiety mode and your brain, your subconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between what is real and what is happening right now and what it is that you are only imagining. So, if you keep on telling yourself, my anxiety is being triggered. I am feeling anxious. I am overwhelmed and completely anxious. Then guess what you’re training your brain to react in a way that is full of anxiety and I know this is easier said than done. So, often we say things and we don’t actually realize the weight that they carry. So, instead of saying my anxiety sky rocketed, those things make me feel so anxious, what if we say this is overstimulating my brain? So, don’t give it any emotion, don’t give it any attachment. Just speak to what is my brain is being overstimulated with that. I can work because now I can choose to do things that is going to reduce the overstimulation in my brain. Become aware of your triggers. Become aware of the things that overstimulate your brain as HSPs. We all have different triggers. We all have different levels of tolerance and it is going to be helpful if you can identify what is your specific level of tolerance? How much can you take before your brain feels overstimulated, which can lead you to feeling anxious or threatened or unsafe?  So, understand your triggers and then make the lifestyle changes that you have to in order to accommodate those triggers. I speak in many of my videos, I talk about these lifestyle changes creating a supportive morning routine, making sure that you get enough rest, making sure that you get enough alone time away from distractions which will allow you to process your experiences of the day or of the moment, and the reason why I talk about this so much is because it works. That is what we have to do as HSPs is we need to change our lives to accommodate for our sensitivity because in that way we can show up stronger. So, that’s the background. Then on dealing with anxiety and now I want to share with you, the steps or the tips that I have when you notice that you are feeling anxious and you notice this, this uncomfortable fluttering, however, it might show up for you. The most important thing is to develop that awareness of realizing I am feeling anxious, and then like a scientist looking at it. What we tend to do is we push these uncomfortable feelings and these feelings of anxiety away or we get lost in them. So, those are the two extremes either denying that they are there or being completely sucked in and getting stuck in the story and in the emotional turmoil of the anxiety and what I propose is that you take a step back and become the observer of your anxiety. So, acknowledge that the anxiety is there. Acknowledge that you are experiencing this feeling wherever it is and then like a scientist begin to explore it, begin to examine it, where is it in your body? What does it look like? Does it have a shape? Does it have a color? Does it have a memory attached to it? What were you doing before in the moments before? Or were you doing something yesterday and you haven’t rested yet and it’s a build on from a meeting that you had with someone yesterday or a visit that you had with a friend or a conversation that you had with a partner or a colleague. So, become a scientist and observe with curiosity, what is this? Where is it? And a lot of times what you will find if you don’t get sucked into the anxiety or you don’t suppress it by simply being witness to it, by acknowledging that it’s there and by curiously observing it. You can begin to dissolve it without having to do anything else that doesn’t always work through but sometimes it does if that doesn’t work. The other things that you can do is to do breathing techniques and I’ve got two breathing techniques that I want to share with you. The first technique is called ‘hand on the heart breathing’ and it it says exactly what it does. So, you place your hand one or both hands on your heart and then you just take a nice calm and gentle breath into the heart space, into the space underneath your palms. Just allow this breath to gently fill you and you can imagine that it is maybe warm and loving air, loving light that you breathe into your heart space and then once you have breathed one two three deep breaths, you think about a loving moment and what this does is, it really connects you into the heart. So, you use your breath to focus on your heart space and then you open your heart by thinking of a loving moment and this can be any memory in time. It doesn’t have to be a very big moment. You can think about your child’s laughter or you can think about your partner, you can think about a pet, you can think about a beautiful place in nature and just hold on to this loving moment while you continue to breathe. So, let’s do that together. You’ll find as you hold on to this image of love and happiness and joy as your heart center begins to open the stress and the anxiety is going to start to leave your body. What also happens is remember when we are anxious, the amygdala goes into fight or flight, right. It, sends our body into fight or flight because it’s the alarm system that gets triggered in our brains and by doing a focused breathing like this, by touching yourself and physically connecting with your own body and also by opening the heart center,  all three of those things lead to calm down the amygdala. You release oxytocin into your bloodstream. The amygdala calms down and at the same time the physical feelings of being anxious is also going to start reducing. So, you are busy retraining your brain at the same time telling yourself that there is nothing to be anxious about and that you are safe in this present moment and then the second breathing technique is called box breathing. It’s also called 4×4 breathing. I just call it balanced breathing and you can do this when you’re standing amongst people. You don’t have to be alone when you do this, you can obviously do this on your own as well. And it’s a balanced breath because you count in while you inhale for four counts. And then you hold your breath for two counts and then you exhale again for four counts and it needs to be just a slow and steady breath. So, all you’re going to do is you’re going to count the breath and as you are counting, you are shifting your attention away from the feeling of anxiety and you are connecting to the breath which brings you into the present moment and again that allows this conversation in your head to quieten down, to calm down also signaling the amygdala to calm down that you are safe. I’m really curious to find out if these breathing techniques do work for you. So, please could you leave me a comment below and tell me about your experience and also if there’s anything else that I haven’t spoken about that you use to help manage and deal with feelings of anxiety that will be helpful to our community, then please share that in the comments too. If you have enjoyed this video, then please can you give me a ‘thumbs up’ It really helps me to get this message out to as many people as possible if YouTube sees that my videos are valuable and the same goes for you to please subscribe if you haven’t subscribed yet. We would love to have you as part of our community.  Again, thank you very much for watching my videos. Thank you for being part of my community. I really do appreciate you and I will see you in the next video. Bye!

HOW TO DEAL WITH EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS AS A HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON HSP (MANAGE YOUR EMOTIONS)

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Highly sensitive people tend to get triggered often, and you might believe that you don’t have a choice about it, but actually, you do. There are ways in which you can manage your emotional triggers as an HSP.

Triggers are strong emotional responses

A trigger is any strong emotional response where your emotional response is out of proportion to the event that has happened. 

It’s because you are not really responding to the event that is happening right. Instead, the response you have is to something in the present moment that reminds you of something in your past.

Take responsibility for your emotional wellbeing

When it comes to managing your emotional triggers as an HSP you need to understand that your triggers are your responsibility.

Start taking responsibility for how you are feeling.  Take responsibility for your own emotional growth and your own emotional healing.

Life will always happen, and people will always do things we don’t agree with.  But how you respond to that is up to you.

When you give your power away by releasing the responsibility of your emotional triggers to other people, you end up having your life lived for you.  You don’t have the possibility of stepping fully into your potential and living a well-balanced life.

A shift in your thinking

This can require a mindset shift.  You need to start thinking differently about the way you see the world and where you see yourself fit into that world.

Taking that ownership and shifting your view, offers you the grace to start the healing process.

3 CRUCIAL TIPS TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE AS A HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON

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If you’ve just recently learned that you’re a highly sensitive person you might wonder, what should you do now?  Perhaps you’ve discovered you’re HSP a while ago but it hasn’t changed anything and you are still feeling frustrated and even overwhelmed.

I want to share with you 3 crucial tips to improve your life as a highly sensitive person.

1 . Educate yourself

Learn everything that you can about the trait of high sensitivity.   There’s so much research being done and the more that you educate yourself the better you will understand yourself.

There are many different dimensions to the trait of high sensitivity and these have been summarized by Dr Elaine Aron using the acronym D.O.E.S.

D stands for depth of processing. Our nervous systems and our brains have been created in such a way that we process everything like a supercomputer.  We are very effective in analyzing, processing, filtering, absorbing, and interpreting all of the information from our environment.

O stands for overstimulation.  Taking in so much information, at that level can lead to overstimulation if it is not managed.  Imagine that supercomputer brain of yours overheating because it’s processing too much information.

E stands for empathy or emotional responsiveness.  Highly sensitive people feel both negative emotions and positive emotions more strongly than non-sensitive people.  Research shows that when HSPs observe someone, the mirror neurons in their brains fire and are more active than the mirror neurons in other people’s brains.  That means that we experience the same feelings as the person we are observing.  

S  stands for sensing subtleties.  Again, this is the supercomputer brain where we are extremely aware of the smallest subtleties in our environment.  That also explains why we are so sensitive to strong smells, bright lights, and loud noises.  Things that won’t disturb another person at all can be really overwhelming for us because we are amplifying all of the information in our environment.

2 Change your lifestyle to accommodate your sensitivity

When you begin to accommodate this highly sensitive side of you in your everyday life,  you’ll find that you feel a lot more power and you have a lot more inner strength and resilience. 

These things include getting enough rest, and even enough sleep.  Taking care of your physical needs like drinking enough water, eating a balanced diet and getting exercise. Looking after your physical body allows you to better manage your emotional and mental bodies.

3 Make self-care a priority

The real self-care work that we need to do as highly sensitive people is to listen to our physical and our emotional needs, and to honor those needs. 

Taking regular time is the most powerful self-care practice that you can start today.  Right now, begin by taking out some time for yourself, away from people and electronics.  Walk in nature if you can, or lock yourself in the bathroom if you have to!

When you take this time for yourself, it gives your brain the chance to deal with all of the information it’s been processing. 

Doing the inner work

Apart from these 3 crucial tips to improve your life as a highly sensitive person, the step beyond that is to do the inner work.

We may carry core wounds such as:

Healing these core wounds allows us to show up in a completely different and authentic way.  As long as these wounds and these emotions are unresolved, they will continuously show up and sabotage you.  They prevent you from really stepping into your full expression as a highly sensitive person.